According to a recent Statistics SA (Stats SA) report, marriage rates in SA are on the decline, and the percentage of legally married individuals dropped from 35.6% in 1996 to 23.8% in 2022.
Meanwhile, the number of people who have never married has risen sharply from 52.8% to 61.7% over the same period.
Relationship expert Paula Quinsee shares insights into the reasons behind this trend.
Sowetan: What do you think are the primary factors driving the decline in marriage rates over the past few decades?
Quinsee: From an economic point of view: cost of living and unemployment. From a cultural point of view: lobola expectation, black tax, and other additional responsibilities like taking care of parents and school fees. Those seem to be playing a role in people’s choices of waiting until later in life when they are financially stable.
Also, changing of gender roles with women becoming more financially independent. They are more leaned towards prioritising their needs and careers over marriage or settling down. There is a shifting societal norm where people are cohabitating more rather than getting married, therefore adding to the reduced pressure of marriage. Traditional norms of marriage falling away due to high divorce rates and the younger generation prioritising experiencing life first like travel, career and education.
Sowetan: Why is this happening now?
Quinsee: SA has some of the highest gender-based violence stats in the world. A lot of people, particularly women, are reconsidering marriage because of what they have potentially witnessed growing up and being in toxic environments and exposure to experiencing some form of abuse. We are also seeing a trend, particularly from a dating perspective, where women choose to remain celibate and take care of their own needs; self-care and self well-being are leading the way.
Sowetan: What impact does the shift in marriage rates have on family structures in SA households?
Quinsee: As a result of high divorce rates, there is a rise in single-parent households. This is creating an emotional strain on a single parent often having to feel like they need to play both fatherly and motherly roles and not having anyone to share that emotional load with.
But also, the financial load that comes from single-parent parents rather than traditional two-parent households. There is a greater reliance on extended family and support systems. In communities, grandparents, aunties and uncles play a larger role in raising children while single parents go out to work to be able to provide financially.
Sowetan: What do you think this decline in marriage rates signifies for the future of SA relationships and society as a whole?
Quinsee: I don’t think it's a South African thing but rather a global thing. If we look at it from an economic perspective, there is an impact on social stability and economic equality, particularly where single parents or households are concerned. More importantly, the well-being of children who are raised in non-traditional households. They don’t have a positive role model from either a father or a mother. Marriage is becoming a personal choice rather than a societal expectation.
Sowetan: Do you think people still value marriage?
Quinsee: Absolutely, marriage is still valued but it's a personal choice... its meaning and significance are changing.
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