While the first wife of polygamist Simon Sekgothe Moela, 62, expresses her undying love for a man she married for more than three decades, Magokubjane Elizabeth Sedishashe did not have a problem with him marrying other wives.
Moela ended up marrying not one blushing bride, but four of them at the same time at the weekend.
Moela, 62, a traditional healer from Tshwehlaneng GaMakgele outside Jane Furse in the Sekhukhune area, made headlines when he wedded Rebecca Nkadimeng, 51, Germina Mokgwadi, 41, Nini Monareng, 36, and Nini Komane, 46 – of course with the blessings of Sedisha, who he married in 1978.
Sedisha was part of the wedding ceremony on Saturday, which left many villagers from around the Sekhukhune area stunned. The wedding was still a hot topic among the villagers yesterday when Sowetan revisited the area.
“I love my husband a lot but I did not have a problem when he wanted to marry other wives,” Sedisha said. “I never quarrel with the other wives because we respect each other.”
The newlywed Komane told Sowetan in front of her husband and the four other wives that she did not regret getting herself into a polygamous marriage.
“I'll be lying if I say the opposite. I'm happy here. We are all happy in this marriage. We are happy as a family and we don't fight among ourselves,” Komane said.
The other four wives were visibly shy to speak to Sowetan and they were content with what Komane was saying.
Remnants of the celebration were still scattered around Moela's homestead yesterday, such as cow skins, beer bottles and porridge that was served to more than 300 people who came to witness the wedding, which Moela described as a “dream come true”.
Moela said it took him 10 months to plan the wedding that was scheduled for May 2 but had to be postponed as a result of the lockdown. He said the wedding cost him more than R500,000.
Thousands of people in the impoverished villages around the Sekhukhune area attended the lavish wedding reception where nine cows and four goats were slaughtered.
During Sowetan's visit to the wedding on Saturday and judging by their awed expressions, all his wives seemed to be happy and enjoying the unusual ceremony, showing excitement as he put a ring on each of his four wives' fingers and then sealed the union with a kiss for each
The tall, charismatic and confident traditional healer smiled lovingly at his sweethearts, telling them: “You are all special and equal to me.”
Three of the brides were wearing identical wedding dresses, with one of them standing out with long sleeves.
Moela and his first wife Sedisha were blessed with seven boys and he decided it was not good for him to only have boys. Today, he has 20 children – 17 boys and seven girls aged between 38 and two years, and eight grandchildren.
Some tips to keep a polygamous union happy:
Sex, love and honesty are some of the things that keep a polygamist family in Limpopo together.
Traditional healer and polygamist Simon Sekgothe Moela, 62, who wedded his four wives on Saturday to bring the number of his wives to five, shared his secret to a successful marriage with Sowetan yesterday.
Moela married Rebecca Nkadimeng, 51, Germina Mokgwadi, 41, Nini Monareng, 36, and Nini Komane, 46, in a rare wedding reception that left many villagers in the Sekhukhune area awestruck.
“I always want to make my wives happy in all the aspects of our marriage. I make sure that I visit their bedrooms as per agreed schedule and I don't sleep with one wife twice in a week. I'm doing so because I want them to equally share me and that decision is making sanity prevail in my home,” he said.
He said he spent more than R10,000 monthly for his family groceries.
“When I buy groceries for my family, it gets received by the first wife who will then distribute it equally to other wives. Everyone prepares their food but my children are allowed to eat in any of the five houses,” he said.
He added that the other thing that keeps his family together is that he does not take sides among his wives.
“When one of my wives is wrong, I reprimand her by talking facts with her. I will tell her that she was wrong and she will accept her wrongdoing and we move on with our lives and forget about what happened,” Moela said.
“Respect is key for all of us and the children. My wives treat all the children as theirs and the children also respect that equally. We are honest to each other and our love keeps us strong. We are a big and happy family.”
- Additional reporting by Peter Ramothwala
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