'I've been fighting for acceptance all my life' - Woman born with albinism

Sometimes when the world views you as different and casts you aside like you do not matter, if you must fight, do it.

This is the mantra used by 25-year-old Itumeleng Nkosi, whose battle for acceptance has seen her breaking walls and challenging perceptions from the day she was born.

Born in 1999, Nkosi from Hospital View in Tembisa was born with albinism.

She received constant stares as a child and always wondered why her family kept her indoors. "I knew I was seen as different but I just did not know what was different about me. I always wore hats and could not play in the sun like other kids. I still get stares even today," she said.

"When I realised what was different about me, I still did not understand why people looked at me the way they did."

Albinism is not the only reason she gets stares. Nkosi is also part of the LGBTQIA+ community and identifies herself  as a lesbian woman. Her dress code stands out as masculine while her walk is slightly fast with tinge of manly swagger to it.

She is also in the process of being a traditional healer and wears blue and white beads on her arms. From time to time she wears iNjeti (ancestral clothes) and cowry shells.

"Sometime I can tell people are trying to figure out my sexuality, and my spirituality, but in the main, it's my skin colour," she said as she casually laughs.

The only place she ever felt welcome was her home where she was raised by her single mother, grandmother and aunts, who always shielded her from societal harm.

It was not until she went to a boarding school for people with disabilities in Pretoria, where she truly felt a sense of belonging. At this school, she would meet other people with albinism.

"It was exciting when I realised that there were others like me. And even though we were what society sees at the same, we were very different in personality, challenges, movement and believe or not, looks," she said.

But it was when her sexuality came into the picture and she did not feel comfortable in a skirt that the school felt different. She would be labelled boyish and followed by teachers to monitor her interaction with female learners.

And while some aspects of her life was accepted, others were misunderstood. "I was still young trying to figure out my sexuality, but I knew I was more comfortable in pants than I was in skirts. Even my movement was masculine. The school just did not get that.

"I experienced bullying for that reason and I was always fighting for survival. I was not only fighting as a lesbian woman at school but also fighting for acceptance outside of school."

A lesbian woman with albinism, Nkosi has always been on the receiving end of rejection, othering and discrimination even in spaces that were created to be accommodating. When she entered the Mr & Miss Albinism pageant early this year, she realised that the pageant was restrictive.

"It was amazing that they have this pageant for people with albinism. But when I got there I was confused. Did I want to enter as a Mr or a Miss? Would I be accepted with my masculine look, suits and sneakers in the female category? And I didn't want to enter the male category because I am not a man," she said.

"I had to have a conversation with the organisers who were very willing to change things around. I had to express my inability to fit into any of the categories, despite my willingness to participate. I was then recognised as a queer activist within the pageant."

While challenging perception has become part of her DNA, Nkosi said it has caused her mental health problems, with anxiety and anger being at the forefront.

"I have always had to fight since I was a child, so that has caused me some trauma. I go to therapy once a month. I booked myself into a mental health institution where I can get clarity and perspective. I am at a point where I no longer care what people think of me. I have put up too many fights.

"All my life I have been fighting for acceptance. I have lost out on job opportunities because having albinism means I am legally blind, the employer would need to put in additional resources to allow me to do the job. Companies and even government entities do not want to do that."

She said she will be voting for a political party that on its campaign trail has spoken to issues affecting black people, people with disabilities and youth unemployment. "I will be voting for the EFF."

sibiyan@sowetan.co.za