How radio broadcaster Xolani “Xtremme” Mthombeni brought Y listeners along when he said “I do” to sweetheart Dithapelo Segodi.
THE MEETING
Xtremme: We met at work in 2023. She works as an executive producer at eMedia, and I worked as the breakfast host of Y [youth radio station]. Since we worked in the same building, I used to see her pass the studio every single day, and I’d wonder to myself: “Who is this beautiful woman?” I even told my technical producer. However, my technical producer said: “Forget it, my brother, not this one, maybe others, [but] there you won’t win … she’s in a higher class.”
Dithapelo: You know how DJs are. He came to me and introduced himself, saying, “Hi, I’m DJ Xtremme,” and I said, “What is that?” and he switched up real quick and said, “I’m Xolani Mthombeni.” I said: “Oh, okay. Nice to meet you.” I burst his bubble because I wanted to see who he truly was, because every time he’d bump into me, he’d tell me I should come to his studio.
This one time, we parked next to each other and walked up the stairs together. He then asked if we could go for coffee. He proceeded to ask for my number, but I told him I’d take his instead —I took some time to text him. Eventually, I texted him, but he took almost a year to make a move.
THE ATTRACTION
Xtremme: I came from a hectic breakup and wasn’t looking for a new relationship. What attracted me to her was her body, yes, I’m being a man about it, but I couldn’t get over how perfect she was. When I got to know her, I loved the way she took care of her kids. I’m a father and I wanted someone who was going to love my son like her own. I also noticed the relationship she had with her two kids; it blew me away.
THE DATING
Xtremme: Our first big date was in Cape Town in 2024. I was working in Cape Town a week before she had to fly down, and we then turned it into a mini vacation. What I like about my wife is that she’s extroverted; I’m more introverted. I prefer being indoors watching movies, and she’s more of an explorer. She got us going to the best restaurants and places that kept us active and outdoors.
Dithapelo: When we started dating, I’d listen to his shows and realised that he had more content to share on Mondays after the weekend he had. I’d look forward to listening to his shows because of the stories he’d tell about the new places he’d tried. Our dating phase went by quickly — after close to two years, he told me he wanted to come to my house and pay lobola.
THE LIGHTBULB MOMENT
Xtremme: I was single for almost two years. I would do radio, attend events, and a lot of my listeners didn’t know that I went into a very depressed stage. When I started dating Dithapelo, my father, without knowing her, said to me: “Whoever she is, please allow her to come into your life because my fear is, she might pass you.” The same day, I drove back to Joburg from home in the East Rand, went to her place, and told her: “Baby, I’m giving you my all today.”
Dithapelo: We started dating in January 2024. At Easter, he came back to me in tears and said, “He was giving me his all.” I was taken by what he said, but I knew he was the one because I had a dream before he came into my life. My late grandmother, who I was close to, came to me [in a dream] and told me the love of my life was coming … this was three months before he approached me.
LOBOLA NEGOTIATIONS
Xtremme: I spoke to her first before proposing or buying the ring. I told her that I wanted to ask her father for her hand in marriage. This was the first time I’d meet her father, in Nelspruit. After her father gave me his blessing … we went to pick out the ring. My father wrote a letter to Dithapelo’s father, which took two weeks to arrive.
They chose to do that as opposed to using PostNet or email, and then my father had to wait for a response. Eventually, a date was set, my uncles went to her family’s house, and after an agreement was reached, we had a whole celebration with both our families.
THE PROPOSAL
Xtremme: I wanted to give her her moment. She came back from work, all dressed up, and although she had already seen the ring, we’d decided to put it back in the box for our wedding day. She wasn’t expecting the proposal. I took her to a very nice restaurant and went down on one knee. The whole restaurant was celebrating and cheering us.
THE WEDDING
Xtremme: I had been on radio for 11 years, and I realised I’d never had a moment that felt life-changing on air. Last year, a lot of the listeners didn’t know I’d be leaving Y, but I did. So I wanted to leave them with something memorable. I decided that I’d do an Xtremme’s journey to the aisle where they’d follow me until the day I say, “I do.” So, I took them through all the content.
From the suit fitting to cake tasting and finding suitable venues, as well the lawyer who came in to talk about marital contracts. One of my most memorable moments was when I put the ring on my wife’s finger; she wanted to marry the kids as well. Because we were blending our families, she gave each of our children their own bracelet with their name on it.
Dithapelo: We tied the knot in November last year at the Fortress Venue in Joburg. Months before the big day, I created a proper schedule of when we’re arriving, when Xolani will be wearing his suit, and when the artists are arriving. It was a proper call sheet for the day’s running order. I wanted to be at peace on that day.
TOP TIPS
Xolani: Plan for your wedding, especially as a young couple. Many people take out loans, but we planned for every cost and made sure we wouldn’t have to worry about any debt because of our wedding.
